Heal Your Story
No matter whether you are taking your first breath in this world or breathing your last, the one thing we humans have in common is our unique ability to gather stories. Your story could be about the trauma of your difficult birth, the abandonment of being sent to boarding school, or the ordeal of your first girlfriend dumping you. Stories are powerful and can affect us in many different ways : as distressing memories to look back upon; as negative beliefs that hinder our everyday lives; as energy-sapping fears about our future. The construction of stories is what sets us humans apart from the animal kingdom.
A deer is chased by a tiger. During the adrenaline-fuelled pursuit the deer is in a heightened state of stress. Yet, the moment the tiger is outwitted and the danger is over, you’ll see the deer gently dip its head and calmly return to grazing... as though the previous terror-stricken moments had never happened.
A human is chased by a tiger. During the heart-thumping pursuit the human’s getaway is driven by an overwhelming fear of death. The moment the tiger is outwitted and the danger is over, what does the human do? To begin with, eating is totally out of the question! First the human must dissect and give meaning to the event of the chase. This involves formulating ideas and beliefs about him/herself and the world at large : I am such an UNLUCKY person; I am so CARELESS ; I am a VICTIM ; I am TERRIFIED of open spaces; I am HELPLESS and VULNERABLE in this unpredictable and dangerous world.
These traumatic stories of our past bury deep inside the human psyche-either at a conscious or unconscious level. The environment then becomes a minefield of sights, sounds, tastes, smells and sensations that can trigger the human’s automatic Fight, Flight or Freeze response. For example, it will take only the sight of striped wallpaper, the sound of rustling leaves, the smell of damp earth, the texture of fur or the taste of that last meal before the chase, to cause our heart to thump, our shoulders to tense, our neck to stiffen, our mouth to go dry, or our stomach to cramp. Over the years these constant reactions and contractions cause untold damage to our mental, emotional and physical wellbeing. We give names to the resulting damage such as Depression, Arthritis, PTSD, Ulcer, Phobia, Panic Attack, Migraine, Sciatica, Cancer, and so on.
Simply talking emotionally about our stories (those we can access that are not repressed deep in our subconscious), does little to change our lives. We need to actively shift, transform, dissolve and delete these falsehoods from the past that have the power to govern and wreak havoc upon our lives! Hence, this is not a talking therapy. The session will be different to anything you have experienced before.
Ever wondered why hospitals give you an instant headache? Why the sight of a dog makes you tense all over? Why the taste of an orange brings you out in hives? Why the thought of speaking in public makes you sweat so much? Why the memory of your first school trip churns your stomach? Why the scent of roses makes you feel heavy-hearted?
We collect many stories over a lifetime, each with varying emotions attached - good, bad, indifferent. The stories that are critical to healing are those that have caused trauma in our lives. Traumas that have yet to be resolved. These stories don’t have to be huge and dramatic, they can often appear deceptively benign. On the face of it, losing your teacher and classmates for 2 minutes on a school trip when you were 6 years old, or your mother returning home from hospital with your baby sister in her arms, may not compare with being 18 and involved in a motorway pile-up in your first car. But stories are not for making comparisons. It is the FEELING that our stories brought up when we first experienced them that matters… and what became of the anger, shame, fear, sadness, terror, grief, hopelessness, etc.
Were you given the chance to express yourself, or were you forced to bottle up? Heightened emotions generally pass when we are allowed to deal with the situation we are faced with - talk about it, argue against it, cry about it - but we are not always given the opportunity. During our upbringing we have all had the experience of unsatisfied, thwarted or denied emotions: at a young age we may not have had the language to articulate our feelings, we may have been raised by parents who were abusive and uncaring or simply unavailable, we may have been intimidated by the grown-ups in our lives, maybe our religion or school system expected us to be docile and quiet, perhaps we were indoctrinated never to cry or to show our emotions, maybe we were never taught to ask for what we needed, perhaps we were simply overwhelmed and confused by our chaotic home life. These aspects of our upbringing will mean that our traumatic stories remain buried or trapped in our cells (ever heard of the phrase ‘issues in your tissues’?), forever on the alert for someone or something in the environment that will trigger a stress response. When this happens we will be taken right back in time, experiencing the exact same emotion (sadness, dread, hopelessness, shame, confusion, guilt, overwhelm, panic etc.) as when the story first occurred in our life. This never-ending cycle will eventually take its toll upon our mental, physical and emotional health, until such time as the story is finally resolved.
I know more than most people about the power of stories. Why? I began my career as a professional creative writer, for over 20 years working in the world of stage, radio, children’s books and television. My own personal story began with intense feelings of detachment from the world and alienation from others around me. From my sickly mother who died the week of my 13th birthday I inherited the story that I, too, was physically weak and threatened by early death. From my colonial, man-of-few-words father, I adopted the story that it was not safe to show my talents, that I should be cautious in life and invisible in the world. Various incidents during my upbringing reinforced these stories. From these beginnings, my path through life was a difficult one, full of obstacles and pain and suffering. These stories caused poverty, shyness, isolation and ill-health. Read all about my journey in my book - how I eventually learned to separate the Truth of who I Am from the fiction of my stories. Warning: magic is involved!
I am now a Healing Facilitator. Although I am certified and non-certified in many different modalities (Quantum Touch, Reconnective Healing, Reiki, Journeywork, Emotion Code, Bio-Energy Healing, Star-Magic Healing, Quantum Entrainment, Emotional Freedom Technique, Matrix Energetics, Yuen Method) my signature method is my use of intuition and my ability to sense and manipulate the human energy field (aura). Where our conscious mind stores only our remembered past, this invisible field that surrounds and permeates the physical body contains both our known and unknown stories, as vibrating electro-magnetic frequencies. My expertise is to help you to not only discover but to clear, delete or neutralise the fictions and falsehoods that are causing a distortion in your mental, emotional and physical reality. The healing process I offer is a unique, empowering and magical journey. It is also very practical with fast and tangible results that will return you to balance and a renewed sense of your true purpose on this earth. You will realise your *God-given freedom to create new stories to infuse and transform your life with vitality, happiness, abundance and health.
*Universe, Life-Force, Source, Energy, Infinity, Buddha, Light, Love… use whatever term carries the most meaning for you.
Example of Story
My son appeared to be the usual teenager - late lie-ins, untidy room, obsession with TV sports, passion for football, rowdy mates get-togethers, lazy around the home. At school his teachers all had the same refrain: ‘He’s a very bright boy and has all the potential to be an A* student… if only he would apply himself more.’ This was a change in behaviour that seemed to become noticeable around the time he was about to leave primary school. It followed him through secondary school, and then to university where the academic focus, less on exams and more on practical assignments, meant that he could get away with doing as little work as necessary to remain on the course. During his third year, with the dawning realisation of adult working life looming, he began to reflect on his future and the worrying fact that no particular career seemed to inspire him. One day he asked me if he could have a healing session for his lack of motivation and ‘laziness’. I greatly admired the maturity and courage he showed in recognising his issue and wanting to address it rather than settling for a future life of ‘just getting by.’
During the session one prominent emotion and one significant belief showed up in his energy field - Grief and Effort Unreceived. Curiously, both of these were attached to a story about losing a football at age 10. There was also another story relating to Effort Unreceived that he inherited from me, as well as a further story of Grief involving a past life during which he’d lost his fingers in a sporting accident(!) After detecting these stories I deleted their energy and following the session, debriefed him on what came up. I began by asking, did you ever lose a football when you were 10 years old? He immediately sat up. ‘Don’t you remember, Mum? I’ve never forgotten about losing that ball, it’s like it was yesterday!’ He reminded me of the family trip we had taken to New York and the stroll down West 34th. We’d popped into Macy’s and his father had bought him a just-out Nike ball. An avid football fan and player, he was so proud of that shiny red trophy of his trip to America. On his first day back to school he showed it to his admiring classmates, then took it out into the playground at lunchtime for a play. One of the older boys sidled up to him, grabbed the ball out of his grasp and gave it an almighty kick, accidentally booting it out of the school playground into the adjoining woods. My son was distraught. Despite the boy and the school caretaker helping him to search among the trees and shrubbery, the ball was not to be found. It was lost forever. I vaguely remembered the story. At the time, a busy working mother, I imagine that I would have been more concerned about money wasted on an expensive ball he’d possessed for less than a week. I wasn’t a healer back then, and wasn’t to know that this was a significant and soul-destroying story that would imbed in my son’s cells, eat at his heart, and sap his energy for years to come.
Grief is a low vibration emotion. So too, is the belief of Effort Unreceived. The latter is a rationale that argues, ‘Why make an effort, why even try, when no matter what I do nothing works / I won’t get rewarded / no-one will notice? In other words, why bother, when whatever I do I will only end up losing my ball? The psychology of my son’s journey from optimistic, energetic, studious child to one who was de-energised and under-exploiting his potential made perfect sense! During the session he experienced many sensations including tingling in various parts of his body and white lights flashing behind his eyes. Afterwards, he felt calm and relaxed, even when thinking about the story. A few days following the healing he texted me from university: ‘Big difference in my energy levels!!! I’m up at 7.30am every day!! I feel a lot more positive and far more excited by things. Thank you, Mum, I really appreciate it.”